fen | 23
end of next month i’ll be a year clean from benzos. and two years clean from opiates. time goes so fast, but they saved my life
when i was a young woman on tumvlr ten years ago everybody liked american football, tigers jaw, ajj, and teen suicide. and we all had a little tin plate with a candle on it, and we needed to be careful not to let the candle go out because we needed it to read the posts. one time a mutual told me they were scared of their candle going out while their phone was charging at night. the dashboard didn’t have the overhead fluorescent lights yet. and we had fan mail, and we liked that comic where the girl is a possum. and the stock market crash hadn’t happened yet. i made a lot of money selling my tunblr stocks and i bought a boat. i would take the boat out to sea and lie down on the deck and go on tumbr and answer fan mail, but i had to use the candle to read the fan mail, because we didn’t have lights yet. it was very dark back then, and one time i fell into the gap between two posts and twisted my ankle. and some people liked elvis depressedly, also, but i can’t say that i was one of them.
Zhu Xinyu (b.1980) - A Certain Month of a Certain Year. 2017. Oil on canvas.
you mean being sullen, cold, unsociable and looking like death is the reason i’m single?
immensely need to lie facedown in a body of water












